TF primary
by Lynx Traveller
Summary: Yes, it's probably been done before, but never to this magnitude. all generations of TF at the one primary school! please R&R.
1. A lesson to be learned

Disclaimer: I don't own TF or BW. Just about 200-300 of the toys, and a handful of 3D CGI models

Well, I've been kicking this idea around for I don't know how long now. I'd like to thank my good friend Crazomatic for giving me permission to go ahead.

I think it's been over a year since I first thought of doing a young TF fic, but although I thought up many many scenes, I didn't have enough to actually write a proper fic (plus very few of the ideas were all centred around one age. I was planning on and might do a "generations" fic yet.)

In any case, please R&R. I was planning on going onto the second chapter last night and doing two characters, but I got yelled at to go to bed.

Anyway, I plan to cover as many aspects of the entire line as I can, so it won't just be limited to Beast Wars. I don't plan to keep it all in list format either; it will evolve into a proper continuing story.

I think that's about all I had to say, some of the later jokes probably only the older readers will understand.

Oh yeah, it's my birthday on the 10th (for all those who forgot and were too ashamed to ask. Anyone?) So I expect at least a happy birthday from everyone.

Enough. Lets get this started (I'll post the next character in a few days.)

………

The school counsellor sighed as she checked over her over-flowing inbox; today was going to be a long day.

To start off the morning, she had several third year students to deal with. It was hard to see such young bots gone astray already, but after lunch she had the older, wiser and generally cockier students to deal with.

Through the frosted glass door to her office, she could see them already filling her waiting room. Still, better to get things over and done with. Sorting through the pile, she called the first student in.

Even for his year the bot appeared young. He was fidgety, and kept looking at his hands, which appeared to be cupped around something that the counsellor couldn't see.

"Sit down son."

The small mech took the proffered chair as the counsellor beamed at him kindly.

"It's Inferno isn't it?"

The mech in front of her nodded slightly. He refused to look up, still staring at his hands placed in his lap.

She thought for a moment and half-flipping through the files on her desk, asked if he had an older brother. He shook his head.

"Well then, what are you here for?"  
Inferno still didn't look up. 

"M-my t-t-teacher s-says I l-like to b-b-burn things."

The counsellor didn't know if his stutter was nerves or a speech impediment. She offered him a biscuit from the tin on the table and asked for him to elaborate.

"L-last week, I t-tried to s-set a s-student on fire. T-the week before, I w-wanted to s-see what colour t-the s-science room w-would burn."

The counsellor nodded. Behaviour like this in a mech this age was usually down to an expanding mind, couple with inquisitiveness. It would be likely he'd grow out of it, but he needed to understand that such behaviour wasn't acceptable.

Just then she noticed a whiff of smoke.

"You're not smoking in my office I hope?"

Inferno shook his head.

"A mech your age shouldn't be smoking."

Despite his meek demeanour a few moments ago, Inferno was beginning to grin.

"Wait a minute. What have you got in your hands?"

Inferno opened his fingers slightly, still holding whatever it was as though it was something precious, like a small pet.

The counsellor stared intently at it, before the dawning realisation that it was a box of matches. She'd been so intent on the box that she hadn't noticed the smoke growing steadily thicker.

She got up to walk around the desk just as it burst into flames. 

Inferno had jumped up from his chair and was giggling uncontrollably and waving his arms around over his head.

"Sweet merciful crap!"

Inferno had begun dancing around the desk while the counsellor ran for the fire extinguisher.

"Fly my pretties, fly!!!!"

The counsellor finally got the fire under control, much to Infernos disapproval.

Shaken, she returned to her scorched desk and locked the matches in the drawer.

Turning to her intercom, she paged two of the prefects to her office, than sat, flustered as the small mech sat disappointedly poking the scorched desk with a stubby finger.

A few moments later the door opened to admit a pair of sixth-years.

"What seems to be the problem miss?"

Fretful, the counsellor pointed to the burnt desk and back at the mech, gleefully swinging his feet under the chair and gazing at the large pile of paperwork with all too much interest.

"Red Alert, Inferno, could you please show our friend this." She pulled out a video, "explain to him that what he did was wrong and why."

The red fire engine took the video.

"Alright! Smokey the bear. I bet Hot Spot will want to join us. Come on Red', let's go find him."

Together they led the younger mech towards the door.

"Oh, and Red Alert?"

The white lamborghini jumped like he'd been stung and turned worriedly back to the counsellor. He was shaking with the telltale signs of a long-time coffee drinker.

"Yes?"

"How are you coping? I know exams are coming up."

He made a small chocking noise and made a move to put a hand to his head as though he had a serious headache, before opening a small bottle of pills and draining them. If anything, they seemed to make him even more wired.

Suddenly, his eyes opened widely and he ran screaming from the office, shouting something about being under too much pressure, and having to find Starscream.  

Inferno shook his head and leading the younger mech out, headed off in the direction of his friend.

Again the counsellor wondered if it was right to give him the prefect's position. Still, with friends like Inferno to keep him under control, the extra responsibility might make him stop worrying about smaller things.

Even so, she made a note to ask the nurse to increase his medication dosage just the same.

………

Well, what'd you think? Leave a review and tell me whilst I type out the next part.


	2. That's why we keep 'em locked away

Disclaimer on the first page.

Well, this is the second chapter. I'm quite proud of myself; of all the series that I've started on ff.net, this is the only one that has continued past the first page. (so ya'd better leave a review!)

I've still got a heap of material left, so I'll be adding a new chapter sooner or later, in the meantime, sit back and enjoy this one.

BTW, if anyone really wants to see me torment a specific character (any character) then put it in the review and I'll rearrange a chapter or two to move them up the waiting list.

Oh, and I'm sorry if anyone offended by material in this fic, I wrote the fic because it's funny, even if weight problems and mental disabilities aren't. If you're still not convinced, take it up with Hasbro for making Rhinox fat and Galvatron nuts, it's not my problem.

The counsellor again checked her list and called in the next student.

He was short, stubby and definitely overweight.

"Sit down Rhinox."

The small mech walked over to the chair, glanced oddly at the blackened burn marks and sat.

As the counsellor prepared to speak he pulled out a gameboy. The counsellor took a long look at him; he was covered in electronic devices; electronic pets dangled from around his neck and belt, a small laptop was slung over his shoulder, and his pockets bulged with LCD games.

"Rhinox, your teachers are concerned that you're becoming anti-social. Rhinox? Are you listening to me?"

Clearly the mech wasn't. The counsellor reached across the desk and took the gameboy out of his stubby fingers. He looked momentarily surprised at being interrupted, but then reached into his back pocket and retrieved another one.

The counsellor again confiscated it, before ordering him to pay attention. He appeared indignant, but did as he was told.

"As I was saying, your teachers are concerned that you're not making any effort to make friends, instead preferring electronic devices."

"So?"

"So, you're relying too much on them."

"None of the other kids like me. Computers don't mind, plus I'm getting good at Super Robot Wars. Wanna see?"

He reached hopefully for the Gameboy, but the counsellor pulled it from his reach, he slumped back and crossed his arms, clearly ready to throw a tantrum.

"Rhinox, you are a technophile. You're totally addicted and dependent on games. You're also not getting enough exercise and are getting fat."  
"My parents say I'm big framed."

"Your parents heads are big framed."

"What?"  
"Nothing, just mumbling to myself. Anyway, you need to lose weight. I'm enrolling you in fat camp for a month; there you can make some real friends."  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

Three floors down, Red Alert had finally calmed down. 

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

The prefect jumped, his optics glazing white. He sprinted from the AV room where a sulky Inferno was making rude gestures at the stupid bear. The red and blue fire engines didn't notice the commotion from their friend.

"STARSCREAM!!!!!!!!!!"  
Sprinting from the room the white Autobot almost collided with Punch, who looked just as freaked.

Punch transformed, now Counterpunch he pulled his gun on Red Alert, quite sure that Red was responsible for the noise, and removing him would logically remove the screaming three floors up.

"DIE AUTOBOTS!"  
Counterpunch looked startled, before transforming and throwing himself prostrate on the floor as a beam from a laser pointer harmlessly lit the wall next to where he'd been standing.

Both bots looked up to where Galvatron was standing. He was drooling, and he looked slightly cross-eyed, his head tilted to one side.

"There you are Galvatron. You haven't finished your 'special' studies yet. Come on, we were colouring in, remember?"

Quite forgetting what had happened a few moments ago, both Autobots pointed and laughed at Galvatron.

"Who let you out of the special ed class Galvy?"

Galvatron just grinned wider, the drool stream doubling its efforts to coat his chest.

"Yeah, ya mental."  
Galvatrons teacher looked deeply offended, as though the comment had been aimed at her personally.

"He's not mental, he's one of my special students."  
"Specially mental."

The teacher huffed, turned on her heels and tried leading Galvatron back to the room.

"Come on Galvy, you were colouring in your picture of your little friend Octane, remember?"  
Galvy half nodded and made mumbled something about Octane and sending the Combaticons to 'play' with him."

"That's right. Now come on."

Galvatron started to be led away, but turned back, drooled dramatically and begun shouting.

"FOOLS! I HAVE THE MATRIX!!!"

Both Autobots tensed as Galvatron opened his chest and removed a small rectangular object.

They burst out laughing, "That's a blackboard eraser you moron!"

Galvatron grabbed the duster in both hands and began pulling it apart, great handfuls of cloth and chalk dust filling the air and making a lovely sticky paste as it came in contact with his drool-covered chest.

Finally he threw the duster at Punch. Screaming he allowed himself to be led away.

"Idiot."

"Yeah."  
"Hey, you seen Starscream?"

Outside a scrying, kicking, screaming Rhinox was being dragged away by two obese adults, clearly his parents.

"But I don't wanna go to fat camp!"  
  


Well, what'd you think?? Leave a review and tell me. I'm thinking of doing a female character next, so put in for whom it should be.

'Till next time.


	3. Rebels

Disclaimer: I don't own TF.

Well, this is the third chapter. A big achievement for me; I've only managed to write a continuing series once and it was my first ever fic (and no one read it without being asked to! Go read it! It's a complex storyline and it's got a monster 300 page sequel coming!)

Anyway, as of now, I'm gonna start acknowledging reviews, so lets begin from the beginning.

Hotshot94: Sure thing, I haven't lost momentum yet. There'll be a few more chapters at least.

Heh…: (I know it was you Albe!) there's a point? ~Tries to spin round really fast to see if point is stuck to back~ nope, no point there. Tell me if you find one, as this fic is supposed to be totally pointless.

Deaths-Head: more scenes of the nutcase coming up. And yes, the Gestalten will be showing up. I'll fit the Dinobots in there somewhere too (Ickle grimmy!). maybe the Predacons and the Dinobots playing Australian football.

And I like your suggestion; I can just see Deaths Head as a Phys-Ed teacher….

Wicked Woman: ~hands box of matches~ yesss, poor Rhinox. And yes, I will continue.

Albe: heh, Leonardo, yesss. And yeah, I lost the bid by 46c! I ran out of net time and could only watch the outbidded e-mails. I'm gonna take your advice on the omnibots and not bid until the last minutes.

Sigh, this is the 6th Astrotrain that I've lost! (and not for trying to be cheap either) if anyone out there has an Astrotrain (or any of the Decepticon Triple changers for that matter, especially Octane.) and wants to help bolster one of the largest private singly owned collections in Australia, e-mail me. I'll pay collectors rates depending on condition. (that goes for any other G1 characters not in my collection too. e-mail me and I'll tell you if I need it.)

Duel Mistress K: yesss, I like the idea of the femmes being cheerleaders, and I really like the thought of Prime being a goth (along with Prowl and Ironhide). 

And yes, I do have a scene planned for Armada. I'm getting worried though; they're selling the toys here (got em all already :p) and the toy catalogues are advertising 'as seen on TV' but I've been scouring the channels and it doesn't seem to be here yet… I've seen the first pilot ep because I downloaded it, but, well, suffice to say my knowledge on the characters is limited.

Vega Sailor: you read my mind; the structies will have their scene, as will Soundwave…

Korman: yes, you're right, Obesity needs to be dealt with. I have sympathy for those with a medical problem, but those kids that come home from school and sit down in front of the comp with a pizza in one hand and three bags of chips in the other get no sympathy. It's their fault, and they're the only ones that can deal with it. And like I said, don't blame me for Hasbro (Mainframe? Takara? Marvel??) making Rhinox fat.

Anyway, I'm not here to discuss semantics, I'm here to write TFFiction 

Ok, that's all the acknowledgements, keep the reviews coming! 

Anyway, this one might seem OOC to begin with, but the end result will make sense. 

Anyway, it's recess now so I'll pick up the pace a bit.

Hmm, I've been thinking a few of the later scenes over, and I've come to the conclusion that 10 year old G1's just won't be able to pull most of them off. Therefore at some time they'll need to advance a few years, probably after I've finished all I can think of with the primary school line.

Anyway, I'd better get on with the show

………

The counsellor sighed as she slid the bottle back in between her books; this day was shaping up to be a bad one.

She paged the next student on the list.

After a few moments she paged again, and again there was no response.

Finally she walked to the door, peering out at the room full of young mechs. There was a small group crowded around a purple bot, two others looked like they were ready to kill each other, and several of the others were sitting around chatting.

"Miss Razor?"

One of the females looked up, she'd been sitting next to another student; both girls were the typical image of their group; both had far too much jewellery, and smelled like they'd been smoking. 

Sighing dramatically, the student stood and handed the magazine she'd been reading to her colleague. At a glance from the counsellor, the other quickly hid the magazine, then cast a furtive glance back at her friend.

"Go get em 'Raze!"

"I always do. See you later Blacky."

"Yup."

With a final sigh, she followed the counsellor into the office.

Sitting herself down the counsellor pulled out a file about a foot thick. 

"Take a seat Airazor."

The student sat on the end of the desk.

"Get off my desk."

From her vantage point Airazor could see the counsellors badly concealed bottle.

"Hey, wanna share that?"

The counsellor quickly grabbed the bottle and slid it back into a drawer. Airazor grudgingly flopped down into the chair, before sinking so low into it that only her head was visible above the table.

"Now, Miss Airazor."

"Call me Raze."

"As I was saying Airazor, this isn't the first time you've been in my office."

Airazor blew a large bubble, then returned to chewing her gum.

The counsellor slid a photo of some graffiti from the girls' bathroom across the table, then pulled out a page of lines from the file. Briefly comparing the handwriting she showed both to the student.

"Is this your tag?"

"Might be."

"Now Airazor, I've told you before that your behaviour isn't acceptable. We like to keep this school clean, but you writing dirty limericks on the walls of the student bathrooms, flooding the toilets and toilet papering the school flag has got to stop. Putting talcum powder in the headmaster's air conditioner just wasn't funny.

Airazor sniggered.

"I know you had an accomplice and I plan to discuss her behaviour with her later."

Airazor leaned forward and wrested her elbows on the desk.

"Watcha gonna do? Suspend me?"

"No, I know after the last time when you were suspended for making mortars with pens and firecrackers that that won't help the situation."

Airazor chuckled.

"This is more serious than that, so I've called in your parents."

The femme in front of her sat bolt upright, a look of shock and fear on her face.

"NO, NOT THAT!"

"Keep your voice down."

She paged the adults, a few seconds later a pair of clearly angry mechs entered.

"Mum, Dad."

"Shut up. I was in the middle of a very important meeting when I was called by the school."  
Airazor's mother looked equally angry.

"We told you what would happen last time if you didn't knuckle down and study."

Airazor had lost all trace of cockiness now.

"We're taking you out of this school and sending you to deportment school."

Airazor shook herself, visibly having trouble comprehending her parents' words.

"Come on, we're taking you home."

Airazor's father led her from the room, her mother stayed behind.

"We'll finalise the paperwork tomorrow. I also understand that there's a matter of some graffiti removal?"

The counsellor nodded and pulled out the quote. Airazor's mother looked at it briefly, then her eyes fell on the photo on the table.

"That's what she wrote?"  
The counsellor nodded. The scowl deepened and she stormed out of the room, clutching the bill in her hand.

Three floors down Galvatron had finally finished his picture. His teacher praised it then gave him a gold star. It slid right off the drool-coated chest.

"That's a wonderful picture Galvatron, but Octane doesn't have red stuff coming out of his ears."

Galvatron grinned even more wildly and nodded his head.

"Who are the others in the picture?"

Galvatron pointed to another mech lying beside Octane. His teacher had mistaken his red colour as just being more red from Octane.

"Starscream."

He grinned proudly and pointed to where a bot was standing over them.

"Me."

Pointing in turn to two bluish blobs and a smaller green one.

Cyclonus, Scourge, Brawl.

In a similar fashion he named the other shapeless blobs of colour all standing around the prone characters. As far as the teacher could see, most of the Decepticons were there.

"Is this a tree?"

Galvatron shook his head fiercely, causing drool to spatter on several of the other students. Some of it landed on Mindwipes picture, smearing it.

"Not tree. Devastator."

Galvatron looked up to where Mindwipe was standing, fists by his side.

"You ruined my picture of Weirdwolf! I'll use my magic spell on you!"  
With that he started chanting. Galvatron stood up and began dancing like a chicken. Runabout and Runamuck started cheering as Galvatron began pecking, getting mouthfuls of carpet. Finally he ran at the wall, knocking himself out. While the teacher helped him up, Mindwipe sat cross-legged on the floor and began playing with the blocks as if nothing had happened. Rippersnapper and Hun-grrr soon joined in.

Just then the bell rang for recess. The students stopped what they were doing and forming two straight lines, followed their teacher out of the room.

………

well, what'd you think? Drop a review and tell me. Also, if there's any scenes of the playground you want to see, now's the time to speak up.

Cya all next time!


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